In the spiritual community, wishful thinking is encouraged. Visualizing yourself successful, fitter, happier, more present, patient, more in love, rolling in piles of money, etc. is often seen as the key to attracting those things you desire.
As a coach, I agree with this and absolutely LOVE the power of visualization, especially when you can feel into those visions and lift your vibration. The problem with this way of thinking comes when your focus gets “stuck” on the future and your happiness becomes reliant on things that are still to come.
Have you ever found yourself saying or thinking something along the lines of: “Once my kids are older, then I’ll be able to relax more”, or “When I lose this extra weight, then I will feel confident and not have to settle for rabbit food,” or “When my business takes off, then I’ll be able to spend more time doing the things I love,” or “When I finally get _____, then ____ can happen.”? Do any of those phrases sound familiar?
With a mindset like this, the joy you are so furiously seeking in this world becomes something you’ll achieve in the distant future. And it often means you are never truly enjoying the moment you are in, always feeling like you are lacking or that things could be better. Your daydreaming eats away at the power you have now to take action and move forward. You get stuck longing for a feeling and sense of fulfillment that is always just out of reach.
As a mom of two young girls (ages 3 & 1), I am constantly hearing, “Enjoy this time – they grow so fast”. I recognize this and am doing my best to be present, but still struggle with wishing for a day when they can wipe their own butts, get themselves breakfast, and sleep over at a friend’s house. The healthy balance of those wishful moments and the simple moments of snuggling on the couch, or holding my little one’s hand as we cross the street are what help get me through the day.
I also find myself constantly wanting to improve as a mother and woman. I not only want to be more patient and present with my kids, but also be more fit and stronger so I can chase them and stay vibrant and healthy while they grow; I want to be a happy entrepreneur with a successful business so I can teach them to chart their own course and follow their dreams, working hard to share their passions with the world; I want to make time every day to rest, relax, tune in and make sure that my self-care bucket is full (easier some days than others) so I feel lighter, happier, and I’m not as quick to tire or get angry. These wishes and daydreams are constantly there in the back of my mind. Can you relate?
While that desire to evolve and become a better version of yourself is completely healthy, it’s also important that you enjoy the process of that “becoming”. That you daydream and then ask yourself what this moment is offering? What inspired action can you take today/this week to move towards those dreams? How can you send out a vibration of gratitude, anticipation, excitement, and still be patient and present?
In this week’s Weekly Spiritual Coaching video, I share a simple exercise that helps you do just that. A very easy tune-in to help you balance daydreaming and wishful thinking with present, powerful appreciation and action.
Light and love,